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Apr. 5th, 2008 @ 02:52 am Punisher: Hurt Zone
Current Mood: aggravatedaggravated
Current Music: gunshots
Also posted in movie_loft

2004:

"Hey, bro, they're making a movie about The Punisher!"
:oO
"It's starring Thomas Jane."
:o$
"He's got a big gun on the Poster."
:oD
"He fights this huge Russian dude."
:oD
"It's directed by the guy who wrote Die Hard 3."
:oD
"It's stylistically modeled on Leone and Peckinpah."
:oD
"John Travolta overacts and the Punisher carries around a fake fire hydrant."
:o(

2005:

"Hey, man, they're making Punisher 2."
:o$
"Thomas Jane wants it to be much more violent and closer to the comics."
:oD
"Jane's hitting the gym twice a week and the budget will be much higher."
:oD
"They're going to rewrite it for the next 2 years."
:o(

2006:

"Hey, bro, they've got a script for Punisher 2."
:o$
"Thomas Jane likes it."
:oD
"They're rewriting it again."
:o$

2007:

"Hey, man, Thomas Jane says the script is finished finally."
:oD
"Thomas Jane hates it. He quits."
:o(
"They're getting an all new director."
:o$
"It's a lady named Lexi Alexander."
:o$
"She's a former kickboxing champion."
:oD
"Lexi wants this movie to be dark and brutal."
:oD
"Lexi hired Ray Stevenson, that badass from Rome, who just happens to look EXACTLY like El Punishero!"
:oD
"Ray Stevenson wants this movie to be like Taxi Driver on steroids."
:oD
"They're using characters from the Punisher's entire 30 year history."
:oD
"They've got an awesome cast to play said characters."
:oD
"They're calling the movie Punisher: War Zone and setting it in NYC."
:oD
"The screenwriter says the script is a POS. He wants his name removed."
:o(
"Lexi says he's a douchebag. The script is good!"
:oD
"The Internet says Punisher kills a guy with a lobster."
:o$
"The Internet says Punisher wears a glow in the dark uniform."
:o(
"The movie doesn't come out until September."
:o$

2008:

"Hey, bro, they're finished with reshoots."
:oD
"One of the actors compares it to Blade Runner."
:oD
"They pushed it back to December 5. Happy birthday."
:o(
About this Entry
Ooh lala!
movieguru101:
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From:martin_bruce
Date:April 5th, 2008 10:11 am (UTC)

Hah!

(Permanent Link)
After reading that, I wonder why you're even excited about this "POS" at all. Then again, why am I looking forward to it?

Maybe this?


Why not?

WOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOT! Let's get some PUNISHMENT up in this Melon Farmer!

xo

Marty